Generally speaking, the Graveyard shift anywhere is a treat to behold. The freaks DO come out at night and they usually show up where I'm working.
I've come to find there are some certainties in working the "grave"
1. People are as big of bastards as they are during the day.
No one, wants to awake at this hour. If we say "Good Morning" to you is it really that hard to say it back? Here's your answer: NO!!
2. Men generally believe night shift is open season for proposition. The females who work night shift are not interested in your typically dirty, unshaven, stankin', night crawling ass. No matter how much you claim you make, it could never be enough!!
3. People tend to believe night time is the RIGHT TIME!! No, I will not hug you!! You are a stranger and what did our mothers tell us about strangers.
4. People pay no more attention at night than they do during the day. Where is the rest room you ask? Why it's under that GIANT sign that is lit up which reads RESTROOM and coincidentally you stared directly at it 3 times already.
5. I know you see me standing right there cleaning so when you make a mess, look directly at me , and walk away please know I'm hoping fleas infest your crotch!
6. I am not MAPQUEST!! No, I don't know how far it is to Georgia from here.
7. When you are offered a bag don't bother responding, "No, thx I left her at home." I've heard that peach about a thousand times and I'm really sure you're wife, who tolerates you on a regular basis and probably has for the majority of her life, would really appreciate hearing you say that!
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